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That's why dateologist Tracey Steinberg, author of , says it's important to clear the air.

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" For a more in-depth approach, the two of you can take the It's a topic you think would be covered — credit card debt, student loans, etc.

are all pretty important numbers to know seeing as, ya know, you take on the debt your partner has when you get hitched.

"There's a lot of shame associated with money, but every fear that comes up or any conflict is an opportunity to create more intimacy and a stronger bond," adds Fields.

"It's important to be able to say, 'Here's my truth, this is how much money I owe, let's make a plan together for tackling this.'"Whatever you do, don't lie about the amount of debt you're in, even if it comes from a shameful place (ie: a gambling or shopping addiction).

It's something you don't really ever think to talk about — whether it was dad who did the cooking, or mom who paid the bills — because most couples don't realize how much it affects the way you view relationship responsibilities, says Les Parrott, Ph.

D., clinical psychologist and co-author of the best-selling book Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts."Getting married is about building a life together, and creating a foundation made of honesty, trust, friendship, and shared values," says Tara Fields, Ph.D., marriage therapist and author of "To do that, you need to talk about some important issues, because whether we realize it or not, things change when you shift from simply dating to being married.Fields says she's worked with people who are secretly -30,000 in debt; that's not a situation you want to put yourself in despite trying to shield your partner from less-than-ideal conditions.At the end of the day, that secret erodes at your trust, and since money is one of the top reasons couples get divorced, Fields says it's an easy way to send your marriage up in flames.When you ask this question, you want to know who has the ability to influence how he thinks and views certain scenarios.

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